When a family or friend has a serious or terminal illness it can be a scary time. I like to research lots of opinions, learn what questions to ask, and gain perspectives. So then I can write down My Own questions for the doctor.
Many doctors won't disclose more then basic information unless you ASK specific questions.
When our beloved aunt was being treated with high doses of Morphine we realized her pain level must be tremendous!! The doctors kept using the term "Advanced Cancer," yet kept telling her/us keep fighting and keep hope alive.
When her husband (who had a limited education) asked questions, he asked about what he understood - time. All he could understand regarding cancer was ..."how long does she have to live?" the doctors would say "I'm not God, we don't know that answer." We only felt this was difficult, frustrated and worried.
We called a meeting with the doctor and he met with the family after his rounds at the hospital.
Know that if you ask detailed questions the doctor will offer you more information. Be open minded and considerate of the doctor. Be prepared to hear the unexpected. And know considering risks and benefits of treatments may be a relief or may make you feel more stressed.
Here's what we asked:
How well did the last treatment work?
Did the cancer respond to treatment?
What is the current treatment plan? What are the goals?
What are the realistic benefits and risks?
-relieve symptoms, shrink the cancer, control the spread? or live longer?
Is the bowel obstruction reversible?
Are there surgery or stent options? Or gastrostomy tube?
With the naso tube is some type of venting a next step?
What are the Risks and benefits?
What do you mean by advanced cancer?
Is it treatable? Is it curable?
Is remission possible?
Is she terminal?
Is it time to consider hospice care?
What are the benefits or intervention and further treatment at this time?
These questions help you gain additional information to help you make informed decisions for you and yours.
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