I stand by my theory of Don in a Fedora. He will be alone, and distant. Betty dying will be a final bit of information for Don's question, now answered: "yes, this is all there is too life."
How you live, graciously or wrecklessly, taking lifes' circumstances and making the best (or not) of them.
But you also realize the finale is not about HOW it will end. It does not matter if Don dies, lives, grows old or not. More than likely none of these things will happen. The finale will end as every other episode did, Don missing out on life. Alone. With Don stuck in his selfish journey, to be individual, and run away from the what Don sees as a "mundane" existence.
We need to delve a little deeper behind the storyline. Understand why
People do things. That is WHAT the Finale episodes have been about, not what actually "happens." Each episode in this "8th season" has been a final goodbye to the characters. As each episode passes, we say goodbye to a character, not to be seen in the series again. And how did it end for them? You watched, you know. They ended like every other day, making a decision, about love, work, or anything else. Sterling, Peggy, Joan, Betty, all remain true to themselves, to their personality. There is no big change, no big a-ha moment, they continue on there paths.
But where is Don's path headed. Where is such a lonely soul going to find happiness, or at least acceptance of "this life."
Genre Realities
I love how Matt Weiner uses current events of the Don Draper era, both in books, movie references, and music. Nothing is unintentional or coincidental in the series. Every newspaper picked up, every TV show thats in the background, these are all strategically placed to add deeper context to the show (especially if you are familiar with the episodes or reading). These items add foreshadowing and explanation for some character actions too. It is authentic, and if you are familiar with the texts, knowing these writings helps you understand the mindset that Don is left with, or the character in the scene, when he finishes these readings.
When Gene Hofstadt (Betty’s father) died in series three’s The Arrangements, the episode ended with Over There, the popular US soldiers’ song by George M Cohan. As his daughter faced up to her own death, it was heard again as Don sang it at the veterans’ party.
It’s Leftover Motel Paperback Night at the Mad Men Book Club. We saw Don whiling away the hours at the Sharon motel with a selection of bestsellers including Mario Puzo’s The Godfather (out in 1969, the movie adaptation was already in production by mid-1970); Michael Crichton’s The Andromeda Strain and James Michener’s historical novel Hawaii. The woman at the pool was reading Alberto Moravia’s The Woman of Rome.
Above was taken from the guardian: http://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2015/may/11/mad-men-recap-season-seven-episode-13-the-milk-and-honey-route-warning-spoilers
The American Need for Closure
I teasingly tell my husband that only American movies have happy endings. Most foreign films end truthfully, life simply continues, without some huge closure. As americans we strive for that "closure" so we can tie things up neatly in a bow and move on. Is that reality? Is that life? Granted Most things do end well: the kids 5th birthday party (unless Don is your husband who runs off when running out to pick up the cake), the school fundraiser, the Monday Morning meeting. Relationships tho, that's where we struggle. Connecting with people and getting satisfaction in those connections.
However, some people can't make connections it really beyond them. Literally not in their ability. A persons vanity gets in the way of some basic requirements to make a person-person connection: show your true self, make sacrifices, get to really know the other person, etc. Most of the men in the series are so vane and into themselves and their role, they simply can't love, because they can't do any of the things required to fall in love. These men weren't raised by loving mothers, giving hugs and kisses, the Don, Pete, and Sterling are powerful because they'll hurt anyone to get there. Their mommies told them they were wonderful and superstars, and didn't show one drop of emotion. These mom's broke their kids but not showing warmth. These men simply can't find satisfaction because they never felt it growing up. They don't know what it means to have a full cup, these men aren't satisfied by pure joy, happiness is beyond their reach.
Pete's Vanity and Life "As it Should Be"
We heard Pete thru the entire series complaining, "this isn't how it's supposed to be, this isn't how things are." Pete lives in the reality he was taught, old aristocracy, old family "blood" values. Pete still lives in the land his mom made, the land of how wealthy to-do's want it to be, properness and the family image.
Pete returning to his wife is already a stretch at happiness that I am shocked, shocked, Mad Men is making an attempt at. It's theorized that Pete is Don's ego, a counterpoint to show how we can learn from our mistakes. Never trust Duck! Perhaps the job offer is real, and perhaps Pete does love his ex. More so Pete needs her to have the "appearence" they were both taught, a happy home, kids, and a wife to accompany you to dinner. Pete isn't returning for love, he's returning to his wife because he (and she) we raised to maintain a certain appearence. It is not genuine love, perhaps genuine vanity.
The conspiracy theory is:
Pete is still his fathers son, his father dies in a plane crash, and perhaps Pete will survive the real crash of Oct 3, 1970 out of Wicheta KS.
Don on Children
Don "can't get no satisfaction." Not thru marriage, mistresses, or one night stands. Don doesn't have an emotional toolbox, he simply cannot fill up on love, or everyday happiness.
Don can't even find love with his own children. Because he doesn't know how. He was not loved, or shown warmth, he knows only sexual love. The rest is emptiness. When the feeling of happiness, love, it never experienced, then you can't recognize it when it's happening to you.
Ironically Don's hotel TV went out when comedian Redd Foxx is on the Flip Wilson show. Episode link here: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lm6fLKz5ByU
He was going into a speech: "Children are a blessing, I feel sorry for" and the TV is cut off... The ending line is "People who don't have children." It's a comedy bit, but makes a great point about the joys of children, and family. Something Don can't have, and a bit of foreshadowing, that he will abandon his kids.
As a mother I too have - a la Betty Draper Francis - been anti my pigeon holed role as mother. But more so then not I embrace my children and the love we share. The simplicity of exploring and experiencing life with them is truly
Amazing. . . Something Don has never experienced. Nor Betty for that matter. She too was busy in her selfishness. Don didn't hear the Redd Foxx commentary on kids and life because his TV went out in a perfect moment.
When Sally comes home after finding out about Betty's cancer, she sits at the table holding her brothers. This summaries the rest of her life. When Betty's funeral shows in the next episode most likely Don won't be there. He has missed out on so much in life, and closure is not Don's thing. One of the last interactions between Don and Sally will be her telling him how the funeral was, and Betty's cancer. It's here, hanging up the phone that Don abandons Sally. If Don shows up for the funeral, he'd have to return to life. Instead of this fantasy running away that he has done, again. Don would have to face raising his children, and he can't do that (he can't man up and take on his responsibility, that is after all what we call "being a man."). Don doesn't face responsability, he wants the world to revolve around him, the image of him as a great idea man (just like a selfish 18 year old). He simply won't sacrifice for his kids, chasing the emptiness is all he has.
Perhaps this moment, when Don abandons his kids we, the TV audience, will stop sensationalizing him. We will stop admiring his ability to walk away. Call it was it is - wreckless abandon. And abandonement of his children.
Don on Individuality
It's been theorized that Don wants to be unique, a man with great ideas. And now that he has achieved that, he wonders still, "is this all their is?"
When a cold mother raises you, matter of fact about life, without hugs and kisses, you grow up with that matter of factness too. It is hard to discover happiness on your own. To search for that "something more" and find it. And so Don is stuck, he is the body of a man, but the abandon of an 18 year old. Don never grew up. When in clienteetings he hijacks the conversation, making it about HIS creative, HIS big idea. He drowns in the praise and glory of his work, built on the backs of others.
Don doesn't want to be one of the many, as he sees in the McCann meeting with Miller Beer. He looks out the window, sees a plane, and wants to be free,
Not pigeonholed. (Sidebar: that plane could be foresight to the last episode).
Don doesn't even realize he is where he's supposed to be, accomplished, lavished, adored by his peers. But he seeks satisfaction. And we, as Humans, aren't supposed to seek fame and fortune, we are supposed to survive. We are supposed to have families. For me the proof is success is man made. Family is in every man ability. To continue, to live on - and that comes in our children.
Pete exemplifies this idea of living on, family bloodlines continuing the work, bearing the name of our family. And bloodline can be achieved less the arrogance. And Pete returning home gets "the best of both worlds" gains his family, and has man made success too.
Don can't ever feel the satisfaction of a bloodline, because Draper is not HIS family bloodline. He abandoned his own Whitman family, he abandoned his created family with Betty, he constantly running from what he is here for. He will always be chasingb something else. Because just being here, in the moment, and appreciting that moment, it beyond Don, it is not with in his reality. Literally beyond him as a man. As a person.
I have an uncle who has been thru hell and back in his life. He could probably relate to the torture of the 20th century man coming from proverty, pains and horrors, and trying to make a life for yourself after a cruel childhood. My uncle has grown on long journey called his life. When we spent an afternoon with my kids this Mother's Day, he stood on the deck looking at my kids, watching them play. He doesn't watch Mad
Men (but he could probably relate). He said "this is it, this is what lifes about. Family. Being here, with each other. Right now."
Why "The Finale" Doesn't Matter
Mad Men has helped me understand my own father in this last season. And not for the sake of knowing who he is, and why he actd so weird, not able to make a connection. But will understanding my own father help me change him? Will his living beyond 75 years change him? No and no. He too is stuck, chasing greatness. He doesn't realize that family is all their is. Because today, one day after your big birthday. When the parties over and the friends have gone, what's left? Who is left? Just the people. And if you treat them with abandon, like they aren't important, you can't show you care, then you really don't have anything left.
If Don dies of a heart attack, or in a car accident, that's the "closure" we seek. But our addiction to the show is watchig how he lived. And how he didn't live.
The End of Mad Men
I anticipate with giddyness the end that has been Mad Men. Awesome series, which I will rewatch with my children on day. It'll be a visual teaching on the importance of giving children, and young boys, the need of their emotional tool box. How to process lifes moments, gain closure, and appreciate "the little things."
Make Mistakes, breathe, reflect and Laugh.Out.Loud
